confession

sometimes,
just to stop yourself from bending,
and crying,
you start to think.
which actually makes it worse.
how it came to this?
how i dint manage to stop it?

this started since the infatuation,
the obsession,
and now,
the love.
i remember you warning me.
hey 'stay straight'
maybe thats when i changed.
maybe you should never warn me
so it would never come to this.

i have a tendency to do everything i'm not supposed to.
i guess i cant stop it,
can i?
this time, its something really outta my control,
something i dont even want to start to think about.
something thats enough to kill me.

this post?
i want you to read it,
respont to it,
or acknowledge it.
but i know that it will do me more good if you ignore me,
and maybe i'll simply give up.
even knowing you'll never really understand,
i want you to.

weird how things end up huh?

give me a kiss

Men are like parking spots,
the good ones are taken
and the free ones are handicapped.

-------------------------------

current mood?
PISSED,BORED,AMUSED,DERANGED

current music?
ne-yo,mad

current place?
bed-fucking-room,where else?

current status?
a motha-fuckin bi.

yes, that was true.
oh, did i mention?
i'm a cupboard.
disguised as a shoebox,
living in a human host.

WHAT??
THIS IS A TALL TALE?
no. what do you mean that you dont believe me??

what do you mean,
that this is even more unbelievable
than me telling you that i actually am i fucking bisexual?

Give me a minute.

I couldn’t find the white shoebox.

Oh, there it is.

Now I’m gonna crawl in and close the lid tightly over me.

Once again,

I’m not coming out.

OH!

*pant pant*

abit hard to breathe.

i'll poke holes..

CLARIFICATIONS!!!!

sheesh
this got me a tad riled up.

firstly
i wasnt tryna perfect the EK SMILE
i just woke up,
for the love of god!

of course my eyes will be small.
fuck.
she knew 'she' reads the blog sometimes.

abit like gabriel ehxzs?
if you did read tht zheru post,
pls read this!!!!!!!
will post 'gathering pics'
tomols.
its late gna sleep

sexuality

i've been scared.
i've been hiding.
and now,
i still will continue to hide.

see that big white shoebox over there??
i'm gonna crawl in there,
and close the lid tight over me and not come out anymore.

the orion, MY orion

Eight stars pin
his frame
to the night.

He lies just above
the trainyard,
almost ready
to rouse.

Not quite yet.

Eight silent silver bells
take all evening
to stand
just as our star
fades him
back to sky.

----------------------------------------------------------

i enjoyd the lj totally
seeing all the things i've been thru since
all i've beared with
all i've pulled thru,
you friends are a miracle

florence-thanks for letting me bunk with you,
consoling me when i'm crying hugging me when i need it

nadiah-hugging me tight when i startd crying and running outta the room without a reason

dayna-wiping away my tears and making me laugh like crazy,
AND STOPPING ME FROM KILLING MY PARENTS.

zheru-making me scared by shouting first

nicole-telling me ghost stories and freaking me out.

these 3 days, i love
you guys i wont trade for anything.
love you all.

*this took forever.

p.s, yes, i'm back to feeling like dying.

these,
my favourites.
will upload the rest
gimme some time,
dudes...