hug me!

omg yushu's pet in pet society just HUGGED MINE! heeheehheeheee so happy!! heeheheehhee!! ok i know it may just be to earn coins or smth, BUT STILL! Yushu leh!

I Love

I've moved on and, I am happy.

What Azel said was true, 'She's got her own life' and I get it I think, that no matter how much of an asshole you are, how evil you get, how i love/d you, you have your own life, and I have mine, and now, it's hardly intertwined.

Sometimes,

perspective.

it just starts to seem bleak and pointless in everything i do. Social butterfly or not, it's getting tiring just being me.

fuckyeahhappy

hi beembo

HI KRYSTAL.

I WOULD NOT HAVE POSTED THIS IF IT WAS A NORMAL DAY. BUT SINCE YOU ARE SAD, FINE!!!

DONT SAD. (K)

Cassandra so NICE!

Cassandra says:
HAHA YOU WERE SMILING HOPEFULLY AND CUTELY AND AWESOMELY

SHE'S SO NICE. heeeheeeheeeheee you dont understand heehee!

HEEHEEHEEHEEHEE!

Little Tiger Snooze

Anyway, i don't usually blog in the mosning cuz I think it's gay to do so (shut up, I said, I think its gay so if you have any opinions, shove it up...) butbutbut, i had this super weird dream this morning (morning cuz i slept at like 3am?) anyway, it was about florence's Moses Cheng hhahah (the better looking one I think I saw in the library I THINK) hahaha anyway, yeah it was about...

HE DIED.

HAHHA ok anyway, the small details in between don't matter (it was just about us being tgt and everything. ONE OF THOSE SMALL IMPOSSIBLE DREAMS that i somehow keep thinking of and tryna sleep again so it'll happen and wish and wish it'll happen irl ahahha. IMPOSSIBLE. anyway my dreams have always been far-fetched. and its cuz of the lujia dream that i hardly sleep anyway hahaha (another long story) ahhaha :))))

see what i mean??!

The Cemetry

I REALLY CANT EXPRESS HOW MUCH I LOVE JESSE MCCARTNEY AND MEGAN FOX! OMGGGGGG.

AND


KNS IM IN LOVE.

ANYWAY, I LOVE THEM SO MUCH I EVEN DREW UP A PLAN OF HOW WE'RE GONNA BE BURIED WHEN WE ALL DIE!!:))))

SO SMART HOR??

And anyway, nicole wants to be buried with one of mine, so here goes

i know i have artistic talent but shhh lets put that aside for a moment.

gimme some more time and i will figure out where alonso and the bungs get buried.

luke has a suggestion 'I SUGGEST THE BUNGS GO INTO THE INCINERATOR OR THE RUBBISH BIN'

luke, YOU REALLY MAKE SENSE.

Never Take Friendship Personal

There's a hatchet got a knife
When I awoke there was nothing real in this life
But dreams are so intoxicating, (intoxicating)
When you're doing this alone
Gun, rope, brick on the way
But words have no meaning when its you that says
I really do care, no baby I, I really do care!

Innocence gone, never take friendship personal
If you can't hold yourself together
Why should I hold you now?
In a sense gone, never take friendship personal
If you can't hold yourself together
Why should I hold you now?

Once a skeptic, now the critic
And you think that you finally found a place of your own.
Amongst the cold and timid souls
Where only failure knows your name

Look around for the closest to blame
But look no further than the hands beneath your arms
and now your 6 feet down, buried with,
with your passing fame fame fame fame.

Innocence gone, never take friendship personal
If you can't hold yourself together
Why should I hold you now?
In a sense gone, never take friendship personal
If you can't hold yourself together
Why should I hold you now?

Oh, oh, oh, you lie
Tell me something more than what you tried to hide
If you can't find yourself, then how can I expect to find you.
Oh, oh, oh, you cry
Tell me something more than what you try
The greatest tragedy is not your death
But a life without reason, your life has no purpose
Your life has no reason, your life has no purpose

Innocence gone, never take friendship personal
If you can't hold yourself together
Why should I hold you now?
In a sense gone, never take friendship personal
If you can't hold yourself together
Why should I hold you now?

Innocence gone, never take friendship personal
If you can't hold yourself together
Why should I hold you now?

okkk, today went to the concert with dayna celine sharianty and rachel and it started at like 7.30 but they came at like 9 so yeah hahah. was pretty fun and all other than you-know-what about you-know-who by you-know-how way. heeheehee eat your heart out.

(more pictures here. dont bother, really.)

I am Us

It scares me how much of a hypocrite i can usually be, spewing words of spite and hate when all i actually amount to is nothing worth half of what they are. i don't know why it satisfies others to see people like me have a mental meltdown just because of one of the nitty gritty things they do to get at me or hurt me. contrary to what you think i actually don't want to be like others just so people can like me or even accept me for who i supposedly am. i dont give a flying fuck to whoever wants me to be just so they can be proud of their own success. their minds are so fucked up and defective it still scares me how much it affects and damages me somehow. but however i claim not to be bothered of their examination and their grading of me, i am still horribly succumbing to it, i am still condemned. they spend their time checking out on people's lives so fucking much they forget about their own, occasionally spewing words of spite mercilessly. they claim that people really aren't supposed to give a fuck to whether or not we are lesbian, gay or queer or whatever venacular you choose to use, but somehow, they still update their blog, they dont lock it, and blog posts of verbal vomit for people to read. i am contradicting myself this i know. i openly stated that i do not detest nor dislike you just because you are you. and the reason is because i think you are an actually nice person deep down inside and i actually want to be you more than someone who breaks rules, someone who does illegal shit just to gain attention. but here comes the age-old question, why can't i just be me? but something everyone actually fails to realise is that no one is actually ever unique (unless you study the specifics of dna and other else) no one is to be themselves. god built us in his image, so what makes you think you can be you when we follow god even in the manner we look like? i want to be unique, i want it so bad oh it hurts. thats also one of the contributing factors why i want to take music olevels, cuz i want to be unique. call me shallow, but thats who i am. and there we go again on that merry go round eventually bringing you to square one-who you are. you spend much of your whole like trying to be yourself when finally its too late, relevation dawns, you are nothing. you can spend your life studying so hard and working so hard that you and your job becomes one as a whole, but when you die or pass off, people grieve, but not long, they forget you, and you become one of the many names etched in the past which nobody gives a damn to look at or to be reminded of. but no matter how you have breakthroughs, epiphanies, you cannot change how the world is like, you conform to become one of them and soon enough you, too, become a victim of this phenomena. thats how the system carries on, thats how people manage to maintain the balance that exists to keep us in line and to save us from ourselves. you can never be yourself. and neither can you be them. and if you actually by some unphantomable miracle or unfortunate event, you manage to do so becoming one of them, you turn into a wannabe. and people maglign you of not having originality and being bad and all sorts of comments to hurt you and shoot down whatever confidence you have left in your self pitying self. its so hard to just simply live and breathe. every breathe i take now seems like a chore and every minute tucking past is really precious i finally understand. by tomottow i cannot appeal and all will be lost if i do not work hard. but there goes once and again, working hard for yourself or others, and for what? for survival you may simply spurt, but surviving for what when as i always said, death is all you life for. death is all you see at the end of the road no matter how interesting or beautiful the path is, we all end up at the same place.

we die. its as simple as it gets.

Class BBQ and Clique Chalet.

this is the picture where i asked Celine why i always look like im eating and stupid girl said, cuz i AM ALWAYS EATING. im not, am i?? :(

and she thinks we both look good here look at the way we both are bending lah!!

hahah at newyork new york where we ate more free candy floss than what we ordered.



the pianists!!

the bbq!

haha we were doing the endurance test!

haha i look like a kid!!

hahah the bbq finish that time, we went like totally psycho and started burning butter, then napkins, then matches, the cardboard and everything in sight.

we are psycho!!

yayyyy!!

ps, more pics on fb!

TIFFANY THE PERVERT

we were talking about how we were both gonna watch shows with megan fox in it, and how for jennifer's body which sh is watching, i watched in the cinema with high definition and hers at home.

then i mentioned got her boobies flashed in it.

then, TIFFANY THE PERVERT SAID:

K Bass Westwick says:
EHEH CUZ THE MOVIE GOT SHOW HER BOOBS ONE OK
Tiffany says:
I WANT SEE

HAHAHAH ok lah se typed at the wrong time in reply to my other comment but STILLLL!!

i want megan fox buried on my left and jessemccartney on my right!!

ps, nicole you want jbeiber or whatevery his name is spelt on your right and jmac on the left WAHPIANG IT WOULD BE DAMN WEIRD WE'LL BE NEIGHBOURS SORTA!

I CAN'T WAIT TO GET MY IPHONE.

Breakdown

I really start to wonder whether people visit my blog, to watch me and how my life progresses as sadly as it does having the satisfaction of hearing me rant or am i actually too narcissistic as to assume that some people actually come here because they care.

but alas, i will never know. this random rambling was actually sparked off by me viewing the previous tags on my tagboard and realising no one actually cares of what i blog but instead of what they have to put across to me and say.

its really hard to open up and blog all i have to rant when there is an enormous bulge of existional angst in me right now.

toodles.

Tiffany, Jorinda and Alicia

TODAY, I went out with tif and alicia to do cip but yah dunno why we ended up at delifrance which was freaking stupid and annoying cuz they serve soggy fries with dunno what mayo and wasabi sauce and i had to ask for ketchup and then they gave the whole bottle which totally tempted me to do the mixing everysingle thing you see shit.

then when Jorinda FINALLY came, after sleeping and saying she'll box me, we went to kfc then when we were about to buy food, tif went 'EH DID WE PAY FOR THE FOOD AT DELIFRANCE??' then i was like, OH SHIT. so we went ack and had to like py 10 worth, and we still had to tell the ppl what we ordered. WASTEDDD!

So thus. i conclude. TIFFANY'S RETARDEDNESS RUBBED OFF ONME.

oh yah then at kfc, we played truth or dare and then i dared jorinda to walk around with a paper writing 'SELLING USED TAMPON FOR $20 ONLY' then she walked around with her super blur blur face.

wah best lah.

then the day ended with jorinda going ' EH WHERE YOU WANNA GO?' in a super cute and niang voice.


I CHOKED ON MY FOOD OK. then i think got the blueberry jam up my nose cuz of it.

I chanced upon a quote from a blog

"Lollipops turn into cigarettes. The innocent ones turn into sluts. Homework goes in the trash. Mobile phones are being used in class. Detention becomes suspension. Soda becomes vodka. Bikes become cars. Kisses turn into sex. Remember when getting high meant swinging on the playground? When protection meant wearing a helmet? When the worst things you could get from boys were cooties? Dad’s shoulders were the highest place on earth and mum was your hero? Your worst enemies were your siblings. Race issues were about who ran the fastest. War was only a card game. And the only drug you knew was cough medicine. When wearing a skirt didn’t make you a slut. The most pain you felt was when you skinned your knees, and goodbyes only meant until tomorrow? And we couldn’t wait to grow up."

how true.

K Bass Westwick says:
EH! I ALWAYS GOT BRAINS ONE HOR!
SAY FIRST LAH! I SMART NOT??
Celine- Imperfect says:
HAHAHHA
yeah lah damn smart lah!


WAH! SO NICE RIGHT???

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i love you

WHAT IS HAPPENING TO THE WORLD

JESSICA SOZHR,
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(the one acting as vanessa in gossipgirl, if you;re actually residing under a rock)
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th one that looks like a tranny
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BRACE YOURSELF!
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!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!




WHICHEVER WAY YOU LOOK AT HER, SHE LOOKS LIKE A FUCKING TRANNY!! ...and a nigga, and an ugly boyfriend stealing bitch.



whereas,

ED WESTWICK,
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so sexy omg pls dont faint
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I ADVCE YOU SIT DOWN BEFORE LOOKING
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HERE GOES
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.
.

looks SEXY IN EVERY SINGLE WAY I SEE. i swear the guy looks good in every picture. you cant find an ugly one of him.


SO WHY IS HE DATING UGLY WOMAN?!

OHMY, the world is coming to an end.

I don't blame Him.

Get me out.

i spent the whole day locked up in my room, freezing my toes off watching gossip girl, dreaming and fantasizing that shit like that could actually happen to me. and that i just might get lucky once in my miserable life.

but things dont work like that. in fact, i seem to the the one and only target of people's sadistic needs to make themselves have at least some pride and worth, and letting themselves know they will be loved. by taking away mine.

so, bye bye world. im taking some time off. and i dont want to see anything, hear anything anymore. but i do love you. that's why it hurt me so much. that's why i said you were just like her.

goodbye.

i cannot be contacted anymore. and no one will speak to me.

isnt that how my life is supposed to be?