confession

sometimes,
just to stop yourself from bending,
and crying,
you start to think.
which actually makes it worse.
how it came to this?
how i dint manage to stop it?

this started since the infatuation,
the obsession,
and now,
the love.
i remember you warning me.
hey 'stay straight'
maybe thats when i changed.
maybe you should never warn me
so it would never come to this.

i have a tendency to do everything i'm not supposed to.
i guess i cant stop it,
can i?
this time, its something really outta my control,
something i dont even want to start to think about.
something thats enough to kill me.

this post?
i want you to read it,
respont to it,
or acknowledge it.
but i know that it will do me more good if you ignore me,
and maybe i'll simply give up.
even knowing you'll never really understand,
i want you to.

weird how things end up huh?